Dealing with crappy people

How do you deal with nasty people? How do you handle it when you're surrounded by juvenile behavior that's reminiscent of high school?

Our old way of handling it was to ignore it, and make fun of them later in the privacy of our own home. But it has escalated to the point of our daughter's being affected by it, and in fact, today a woman yelled at them over a rumour that has been going through town.

I have to confront her over it.. and I have this huge fear of confrontation. But, I certainly can't let this slide. The poor girls were so upset.. "Why are people saying these things about us?"

I have to back-step a little to get this story out and show the true magnitude of it all. There is this woman in town named Robin, and she makes and sells magnetic jewelry in town. Over the hot part of the summer, she had her table set up inside of the store that Brian works at on the weekends. Normally, she sets up outside.

Well, a little over a month ago, she got really sick, was in the hospital, and then stuck home on oxygen. Some women came in the store that wanted the magnetic jewelry, and because Robin was doing so bad, unable to work, and doing poorly financially, Brian sold them some of her bracelets... Just then, his boss walked in, and she had a cow over it all. Told him to never ever do that again.. blah blah. After work, he and I went together up to her house to bring her the money, and Brian told her the story of what happened, and did so in the sense of.. I can't do it again .. type thing.

Robin then went off about Brian's boss and was saying all sorts of things about her.. we just smiled and nodded, and went on our merry way. Well, then this last Saturday, Brian got to work and his boss was waiting for him.. she had heard that BRIAN had badmouthed her to ROBIN! She also said other shop owners were complaining about the baby crying the previous Sunday.. He had been taking baby to work with him on Sundays (with their permission) so he could spend some time with him.. he was working 7 days a week. Well, the only "shop owner" close is Robin, and she was making snide remarks to Bri all day about the baby crying. He almost got fired over it all, and was put on probation.

So now, back up again to about a month ago.. just after Robin came back to work. Robin tells me to come talk to her, and I do.. she then tells me that my daughter's have been going up and down the street and begging for food. She said that they begged Gwen and she gave in and bought them ice cream. My girls know Gwen quite well, and do beading of jewelry for her quite often on the weekends. She gives them jewelry in return for it. So, I went and asked Gwen. Gwen told me that no, they didn't beg or demand, but they had come in while she was eating ice cream, and had asked for one, and she told them that they'd have to do some work and earn the money for it.

I talked to the girls about asking people for stuff like that, and they understood. I went back and told Robin that it was a misunderstanding, and they weren't begging. She told me that her daughter was in there when it happened, and that's how she heard it, and then she told me that Gwen wasn't the only one who had come to her and said something. I asked who else, and she wouldn't tell me. I then figured she was trying to cover up a blatant exaggeration, and didn't pry.

So, the matter was over. I then made sure that the girls came straight home after getting off the bus. And, after Bri told me about what his boss had said, I didn't let them go downtown this last weekend at all, because I didn't want them to go in by Brian and get him in trouble. So, it's been a week and a half since the girls have even been seen in town.

Today, a woman called them over by her as soon as they got off the bus and proceeded to yell at them, saying.. "I don't ever want to hear about you two begging tourists for money and food again!"

This thing has gone from them asking for ice cream in front of Robin's daughter, to them begging for food and money in the streets to the tourists that come through town, and some woman took it upon herself to discipline them for it! What the fuck?

We don't know how to handle this... It just keeps growing and growing, and something certainly HAS to be done. At the bare minimum, the woman who thought it ok to yell at them has to be informed that it is not. And, something needs to happen with Robin too. I told Bri that he needs to tell his boss that it was Robin doing the badmouthing, and not him, but he's uncomfortable with sinking to her level. Though, I don't think it is her level.. because he is telling the truth.